Today, Comments in the Spam queue are up to 13, a new record. Most are complimentary, however a few continue to presume to give me advice, supposing that all I desire in life is to have more optimistic Gargle rankins. One criticises my inability to write interesting and exciting headings, citing a heading that has nothing whatever to do with my Posts! They even go so far as to suggest that “themindbogls” itself is a limp and uninspiring effort, undeserving of Gargle’s mighty favour. I am minded to tell this impudent baboon to fuck off. Fuck off, impudent baboon. Stay off the fermented fruit!
Then I notice two things about these deliberate provocations. From the address details kindly provided by Mr Arkansas, the WordPress Spam organiser, I observe that some of you appear to be sending your messages in disguise. They purport to come from web sites in proper countries like America, that are represented at the Olympics, not from your rutted feudal demesne somewhere in the Carpathians, that could manage only a bronze medal in the puddle-jumping. I take it you have the real owners’ permission? I guess this relates to a message I had recently, offering me a poxy server. I had wondered what a poxy server was, envisioning a tired Moldovan waitress in a North London trattoria. Now I know, it is the digital equivalent of a false moustache and glasses.
Secondly, you are not at all interested in what I have to say, you naughty little bloggers! You are a Viagra salesman or woman! Well, I don’t need your little blue pills to perk up my headings, I have given up sex purely in order to write this bogl, save money and to live more closely with Nature, in the shapes of my lovely cat Scat and dog, Hunzi. So, unless you supply the women to go with the pills, they can play Scrabble and make proper hot cocoa, you can fuck off as well, in this case literally! (My little joke, no offence!)
Good, keep ’em coming!